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Malone

I forgot to say that you had a nice idea and it was well executed. You are very creative!

Jigjag, thanks for your posts - and your compliment! I found Inquisitor very straightforward today so had plenty of time on my hands.


Yes, let's see some of the 'made-up words'.

Disappointingly, visiting the garden centre today did not yield anything for me to be pedantic about, to be a 'grumpy old man' about, so I am having withdrawal symptoms.

Now, now, Steve - you should be pleased that you didn't encounter anything offensive, wrong or irritating today....



… but I know what you mean about the withdrawal symptoms!

Malone

I visited the market yesterday to speak to the grumbling greengrocer, Ivan Napple, hoping to hear about his latest moans. I asked if he knew your friend, Ivor Aspberay, the famous fruit farmer from far-flung Forfar (no alliteration intended).

“I know Ivor well” he said. “He supplies all the fruit and veg stalls here. In fact, one of my customers, a Scottish lady, arranged it. We got a great deal and she was the middleman, or should that be middlewoman, I never know.”

“It’s the same with all these stupid made-up words like “Chairperson” “Spokesperson”and the ludicrous “Hupersonkind.” What’s that all about?”

“I can tell that you are not pc”, I said.

“PC? The only PC I know is the one who comes in here, or WPC as I still call them, WPC Laura Norder she told me. Funny thing is, everyone calls her Jo. She’s clever Jo, and I am sure she is having me on.”

With thanks to Malone and Cleverjo for their ideas.

I've walked into town and couldn't help looking for rogue apostrophes.
(Thanks Steve!)

All I noticed was the absence of a couple;

Mens Hairdressing and Pensioners Special

I find this less offensive to the eye than seeing them in the wrong place but still had a groan.

Thanks, Jigjag - your report of your outing was highly amusing. I'll probably have another read of it later as I need to unpack the latest load of shopping from Tesco/Tesco's/Tescos/Tescos'/Tescoses.

Rossim. Vigilance is good, if not always rewarding.

Thanks, Malone, your kind words make the writing of these pieces worthwhile.

I think you can add to your list of Tesco variations you listed. It would be interesting to see how many there are. In the same vein, I have been working on my sentence containing "PC". I have improved from 6 to 8 and hope for more.

Jigjag, I'd like fewer Tesco variations, not more! I'm glad you enjoyed your trip to the market yesterday, it made for amusing reading. This is a short post as I have a pile of crosswords to tackle - Mepherto, Everywoman and the one in the Spectatrix.

Malone, Good luck with those crosswords. I have tried them in the past and they are too difficult for me. You need to be an expert in the subjects of Herstory and Gerperson, and I am not.

BTW - I am used to footballers playing "out of their skin", but I heard that a top female tennis player has won a match by being a " bit out of body". But which "bit"? I know you are a tennis fan, so how did she do it? I can't get my head round it.