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Hi Helen,

Sorry if I caused offence, it was only in jest. Post panto euphoria.

Helen

Know what you you mean re malicious responses, 'though John from A is "normally" OK. I was, for a short, a regular contributer but was rather disheartened by some of the more arrogant contributers, so decided to withdraw.

I note, with some regret, shared, I believe, with many others, that campanilla, good old campo, has ceased to contribute. A major loss to this and any website.

JimB

I thought I would share this little story from today's Diary in The Herald. It's very typical of Glasgow humour.

BAD weather meant a few bumpy landings at Heathrow this week, particularly one flight from JFK. A little Glasgow granny had to register her discontent to the rather sheepish pilot as he stood alongside the flight crew.

“Did you land the plane, son” she asked.

“Yes ma’am.”

“Thank God for that,” she said, “I thought we’d been shot down.”

Helen,
You should lighten up a bit. John of A merely pointed out that Euros were not in Spain in 1986 and,of course, that 20 pesatas wouldn't buy anything worth having. Don't be so sensitive.

Helen

Hey, I think you deserve more respect,there are some shallow posters who have little understanding of fair play

JimB

For God's sake. She said something that couldn't possibly be right and when this was gently pointed out to her promptly had a hissy fit.

here we go again.

Deep breath everyone, think lovely thoughts; hello trees, hullo sky.

Anyone got a joke?

Is this one any good?

A farmer named Clyde had a car accident. In court, the trucking company's fancy hot shot lawyer was questioning Clyde .


"Didn't you say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine,'?" asked the lawyer.


Clyde responded, "Well, I'll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favourite cow, Bessie, into the..."


"I didn't ask for any details", the lawyer interrupted. "Just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine!'?"


Clyde said, "Well, I had just got Bessie into the trailer and I was driving down the road...."


The lawyer interrupted again and said, "Your Honour, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the Highway Patrolman on the scene that he was just fine. Now several weeks after the accident he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question."


By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Clyde's answer and said to the lawyer, "I'd like to hear what he has to say about his favourite cow, Bessie".


Clyde thanked the Judge and proceeded. "Well as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my favourite cow, into the trailer and was driving her down the highway when this huge semi-truck and trailer ran the stop sign and smacked my truck right in the side. I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into the other. I was hurting, real bad and didn't want to move.

However, I could hear old Bessie moaning and groaning. I knew she was in terrible shape just by her groans. Shortly after the accident a Highway Patrolman came on the scene. He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he went over to her. After he looked at her, and saw her fatal condition, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.


Then the Patrolman came across the road, gun still in hand, looked at me, and said, "How are you feeling?"






……………….

"Now what the F**k would you say?"

That'll do nicely!