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Good morning Norah

I would be very grateful if you would read through the CLUELESS 129 thread and then perhaps you and Ash could look at the VIZ threads.

I would much rather be banned from the site than submit to your petty blackmail - by all means slap a wrist and delete posts if you must but to give in to the petty complaints from a few spiteful people is not reasonable.

rambler

I object to the phrase 'petty blackmail', I make no apology for the email I sent you. The people who complain are not spiteful, Ash and myself are responsible for running a friendly CROSSWORD Forum and we agree with the complainants that urban slang has no place in this environment. It is obvious that a lot does escape censure because I am not told about it. However, when I am informed I take what action I deem appropriate.

It is a free Forum for all to enjoy and, as such, we do not have the staff time to read every thread so we depend on users to use appropriate language for such a Forum. As I pointed out in my email, there are other sites on the internet where the use of such language is more appropriate.

Thank you for your reply, Norah. Of course I don't agree with you about 'cottaging '- it's in Chambers which is the dictionary of choice for most of us.

Please note that if you send me emails in future I shall post them on the forum if you have not banned me from the site.

There are probably a lot of words in Chambers that Ash and myself deem unsuitable for a friendly Crossword Forum, just the fact that they are in the dictionary does not make them acceptable to us.

I have already been informed that you have posted my email from last night, I have no problem with that but thank you for telling me.

I have no desire whatsoever to ban you or anyone from the site, I just want everyone to use language that is suitable for such a friendly Crossword Forum.

Norah, I appreciate that policing a site like this is difficult, but I'm not convinced the correct balance has been struck on this occasion.

I also feel slightly guilty as my earlier post @11 in the clueless thread

"Hope this doesn't offend anybody....

Refuse to handle young man soliciting in public lavatory, not getting on(7)"

may have encouraged rambler to use the word explicitly which I use in the wordplay for the above clue, ie boy + the offending word minus "aging"...although rambler only used it as a double entendre whereas I used it in the sense(it's Chambers entry gives it as slang but not "taboo or offensive") which seems to have caused offence.

The relevant question it seems to me is whether ramblers/julianandsandy's post could be considered as offensive and objectionable to a reasonable person of ordinary sensibilities. I don't think ramblers post could be considered homophobic and therefore find it hard to see where the offence lies.

Slang words in themselves cannot be considered offensive, Chambers and other dictionaries generally tag such words like C*** or N***** as "taboo/offensive/derogatory", the word used in this case simply doesn't fall into that category.

Again, I do appreciate the difficult task you have moderating the site and the great work you do.

Regards

Ixion

Thank you, Norah for backing down from the threat to ban me from the forum over the use of an iffy word. I maintain that the people who objected are narrow-minded but I accept your point of view and also accept that you are the administrator and you are in charge.

Thanks for the conversation - best wishes to you and Ash.

rambler

My post crossed ixion's.

I perhaps should not comment as I do not take part in some of the longer threads like Clueless - what saddens me is the rush to report rather than perhaps a discussion with the poster who has irked you, there and then on the same post.

I am old enough to be both part of the 'I am outraged' Brigade but equally old enough to be broad-minded and sensible - I think I once reported an advert posing as a query in all the time I have been here.

Sorry to stick my beak in, but Rambler is a great poster and felt the need.

Mamya

Here, here Mamya.

As rambler points out, the VIZ posts are filthy, and I think it's fair to say that they're usually degrading to women (well, men too, but let's face it; we usually don't care). We recently had a thread in which we talked about what you might call "selective outrage"- how it's acceptable to slur members of (say) some races and religions but not others, and God help you if you haven't memorized the approved list. I for one just won't buy into the overextending nanny state (not that I go around slurring people, mind you), though when (just the other day) Michelle Obama announced that she wants everyone to drink more water I must admit I wanted to jump off a bridge.
By the way, not being as familiar with what used to be called perversions as rambler and ixion are [:)], I had to look the term up. "Cape Cod cottage" has taken on a whole new meaning.