I hope you have an absolutely splendid birthday, Marty, with lots of love, fun and laughter.
Your cake is chocolate fudge, layered with ganache. The decoration is entirely in black and white. On top is, naturally, a crossword grid; the AB style clues are on the cake sides. A funnily-shaped inkwell containing a "quill" pen with edible ink sits on the top right hand corner of the cake. The quill is one of the beautiful metallic feathers from a magpie.
In best "Listener" tradition, some clues are missing (actually because there isn't much space for them and I'm lazy!) When the grid is complete, the crossing letters will spell out a message.
A further complication is 3 marzipan models of magpies on top of the cake, obscuring parts of the grid. Be careful if you decide to eat them, as the legs contain dry sphagetti!
(Perhaps I should explain that I believe Marty is a Newcastle United fan, and he Ok'd a thread today)
It's a beautiful day here, I hope it is where you are
Roz