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celadon

17th October 2013, 07:36
Crazy Laws - Washington
It is illegal to paint polka dots on the American flag.

All motor vehicles must be preceded by a man carrying a red flag (daytime) or a red lantern (nighttime) fifty feet in front of said vehicle.
1442 of 1953  -   Report This Post

busby

17th October 2013, 07:59
The same motor vehicle law is still current in Oz, so horse riders have a chance to move and not be spooked by the vehicle.
And it is legal for a driver to urinate in a public place as long as he faces the wheel of the vehicle he was driving. YUCK !!!


Where do you find these ? Love 'em !
1443 of 1953  -   Report This Post

celadon

1st November 2013, 09:06
A news letter that is sent from the States, Busby.


A day late:-

What's the witches favourite pop group?
1444 of 1953  -   Report This Post

celadon

6th November 2013, 08:47
A very shy unpopular kid regarded as a loner by many and who was occasionally bullied by classmates for being a "mama's boy". He was brought up very poor in mostly black neighbourhoods and housing projects. Who was he?
1445 of 1953  -   Report This Post

ab

6th November 2013, 14:22
Elvis Presley?
1446 of 1953  -   Report This Post

celadon

9th November 2013, 17:47
Well done ab.
...............................................

MASKED protesters around the world have called for a sequel to the 2006 dystopian thriller V for Vendetta.
Activists in London, Japan, Australia and New Zealand demanded that producers immediately open talks with Natalie Portman about starring in a second film.
Protester Tom Booker, who asked to remain anonymous, said: “That such a fully realised cinematic universe has not been revisited is a crime for which we hold world leaders and big business equally responsible.
“The time for a sequel, with Portman taking on the role of her masked mentor in an outfit with less cloak and more leather corset, is now.
“And yes, I’m willing to make the script I’ve written available.”
A spokesman for the G8 nations said: “We recognise the passion of the individuals involved, but they need a lesson in geopolitical realities.
“V for Vendetta only grossed $132 million, which after production costs and marketing barely made the studio a profit.
“And from a story perspective the fascist regime was defeated, leaving any putative second film without a third act conflict.
“The best we can offer is a straight-to-DVD prequel starring Tara Reid and a former wrestler.”
1447 of 1953  -   Report This Post

celadon

14th November 2013, 10:32
A farmer in the country has a watermelon patch and upon inspection he discovers that some of the local kids have been helping themselves to a feast.

The farmer thinks of ways to discourage this profit-eating situation. So he puts up a sign that reads: "WARNING! ONE OF THESE WATERMELONS CONTAINS CYANIDE!"

He smiled smugly as he watched the kids run off the next night without eating any of his melons.

The farmer returns to the watermelon patch a week later to discover that none of the watermelons have been eaten, but finds another sign that reads: "NOW THERE ARE TWO!"
1448 of 1953  -   Report This Post

celadon

16th November 2013, 15:10
TV CHEF Jamie Oliver is to make Death Row prisoners’ last meals healthier and more nutritious.
The forthcoming Channel 4 series Jamie’s Death Row Meals was inspired by reports that a murderer in Florida had enjoyed a calorific final meal of fatty foods including pizza, chicken gizzards and ice cream.
Jamie Oliver said: “American jails need to promote fresh, balanced dining options to killers on the day of their execution.
“Every year hundreds of men and women are going to the gas chamber without having tried home-made pesto or even a simple rocket salad sprinkled with pine nuts.
“Not only that, but in the unlikely event that they get a last-minute reprieve they won’t survive another decade on a diet of deep fried pig knuckles.”
Filming has already begun on contrived scenes where Jamie clashes with prison catering staff over their reluctance to push salads, steamed fish and locally-sourced produce to people who are staring death in the face.
In the show, inmates final meal requests are taken as normal, then ignored as Jamie whips up a healthy alternative.
Convicted murderer Roy Hobbs said: “For my last meal this morning, I ordered two racks of barbecued ribs, seven pounds of home fries and a two-foot hot dog, all covered in bright yellow liquid cheese.
“So you can imagine my surprise when a suspiciously plump English dude arrives with a ‘four-grain summer salad’.
“If this is what the world’s come to, I’m ready to die.”
1449 of 1953  -   Report This Post

syzygy

18th November 2013, 04:58
Good one, Celadon !

Not sure if you posted it or where I saw it.
Crazy laws -- in Colorado it is / was illegal to collect rainwater. The idea was that you were stealing from those who had "rights" to the water-table.
Duh!! Where did they think the water would end up? Sold to aliens?

They have lightened up a bit:
http://www.ncsl.org/research/environment-and-natural-resources/rainwater-harvesting.aspx

Scary people.
1450 of 1953  -   Report This Post

celadon

20th November 2013, 15:04
Scientists say they've found the world's oldest creature -- unfortunately, they've also killed the poor thing.
The creature in question is an ocean quahog known as the 'Ming clam'. It was found in northern Wales about seven years ago and, at the time, it was believed the creature was roughly four hundred years old.
That meant the Ming clam was the world's oldest creature, and soon found itself in the Guinness Book of World Records. Perhaps unsurprisingly, the previous record was set by another clam, though that one was discovered in Iceland.
However, upon further investigation scientists at Bangor University in Wales found that the mollusk was, in fact, more than five hundred years old.
In order to reach that conclusion, the Welsh scientists had to freeze the Ming clam and then open it up in order to study its inner rings.
That process, which resulted in the researchers killing the creature, showed that the mollusk began life 507 years ago. That means the Ming clam was born in 1499 -- just a few years after Columbus discovered the New World.
For their part, the Bangor University scientists said they didn't intend to kill the ancient clam.
"The longest-lived clam was collected along with many others and, as it is impossible to age the clams until their shells have been opened, there was no indication of its extreme age until after this had been done," Bangor University noted in a press release.
"The notion that scientists knew in advance that it was the longest-lived species and then deliberately destroyed it is plainly incorrect."
In any case, the Bangor University researchers are certain they've got the Ming clam's age right this time around.
"We got it wrong the first time and maybe we were a bit hasty publishing our findings back then," noted Bangor School of Ocean Sciences researcher Dr. Paul Butler. "But we are absolutely certain that we've got the right age now."
1451 of 1953  -   Report This Post