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The last bit is somewhat of a giveaway(which is why I decided to post it as an add on) - knowing the "argot" early on(six letters) would have made the clues a matter of googling.

Nadsat. Alex Beethoven?

peterm beat me to it :) That took much googling on my part!

Just checking back in. Don't see how charpie is an anagram of the last letters of the clues. Oh, and peterm is a showoff.

Nice one peterm...thanks for playing guys...I'm off to the pub!

Sure, he goes off and gets drunk, and I have to get back to polishing my woodstove. What a deal.

Excellent work ixion, very entertaining, however I'm with aristo on not getting the 'charpie' bit?

I only got it because of ixion's last post, and Google (of course).

aristo - it's an anagram of the penultimate letters ("those adjoining posteriors"). Show off? Moi?

Well done ixion.

Woodstove huh....so that's what they call it these days ;)

Argot once again.