DIETING UNDER STRESS.
1. If you eat something and no one sees you then the food has no calories.
2. When you eat with comeone else, the calories do not count if they eat more than you do.
3. If you drink a diet cola with a chocolate bar, the diet cola cancels the calories in the chocolate.
4. Broken biscuits contain no calories - the process of breaking causes calorie leakage.
5. Food used for medicinal purposes never counts; e.g. hot chocolate for relaxation; brandy for fortification; toast and cheesecake as antidpressants.
6. It is recommended that you fatten up everyone around you so that you appear slimmer.
7. Food licked off cutlery or out of a bowl has no calories if you are following a recipe, e.g. butter icing on a cake; the remains of a scone mixture; cream for the top of a trifle.
8. TV and cinema food contain no calories as they are part of the whole entertainment package.
9. Foods of the same colour have the same number of calories, e.g. spinach and mint ice cream; mushrooms and white chocolate; water and a large gin and tonic.
10.Athletes eat huge amounts of pasta before races like the marathon. It's a myth that you have to run 26 miles to work it off. One brisk trot around the settee is quite sufficient to wipe out one bowl of spaghetti. Twice round the living room will use up as much energy that a chocolate bar is required to supplement your sugar level and rebuild your strength.
Good Luck !!