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torvic

8th July 2009, 17:31
I used to eat lots of natural foods until I found out that most people die of natural causes!
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campanilla

8th July 2009, 17:34
If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before.
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jimb

8th July 2009, 17:39
If you are not living on the edge then you are taking up too much room.

I'm off now, if I don't see you through the week, I'll see you through the window
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john (from arran)

8th July 2009, 17:49
In theory, theory and practice are the same. In practice, they're not.
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campanilla

8th July 2009, 17:51
For every action there is an equal and opposite government programme.
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the joker

8th July 2009, 17:57

Hypochondria is the only illness I haven't got.
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campanilla

8th July 2009, 18:02
If it's called the tourist season howcome we can't shoot them?
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the joker

8th July 2009, 18:03

An alcoholic is someone who drinks more than his doctor.
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campanilla

8th July 2009, 18:04
Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.
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the joker

8th July 2009, 18:09

Why is it that some days you're the dog and some days you're the lamp post.
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